8. Summer .. Moving On

Summer/Beginning of Senior Year


To say that the summer before my senior year started a little rough, would be like saying the Titanic ran into a small patch of ice.

I had broken up with Katie Coleman, and due to the circumstances, I lost another good friend in the process. I was mean spirited and hateful toward Jason after mine and Katie’s break up. I blamed him for everything; simply because he was the easiest one to blame.
So there I was in the summer before what was to be the “best days of my life”, without my girlfriend and without one of my best buddies.

Thankfully I had my best friend since 6^th Grade, David ‘Tater’ Turner – A Great American.
Tater knew how down I was about the situation I was in, and he did his best to keep me busy and my mind off of how bad I felt. We spent many a summer afternoon in my back yard shooting basketball. We would go camping in his Mom and Dad’s HUGE back yard.
The Turner’s have tons of land filled with horses, fireflies (we call them ‘Lightening Bugs’ in the South), and lots of mosquitoes. We spent many a night around a campfire solving the world’s problems, and occasionally discussing our own.
The great thing about being from my hometown of Laurinburg, NC is that you are only two hours from the beach. Over many summers, I had gone with my family to Pirateland Campground in Myrtle Beach SC.  This summer was no different, and like the summers before… Tater went with us.
What had become a tradition of sort was that in the evenings, I would take my guitar down to the gazebo. A crowd anywhere from 10-30 teenagers would normally find their way to where we were, and we would have a big sing a long session on the beach. We sang loudly with sun burned bodies, stolen beer, and raging hormones.
It was at Pirateland Campground that I learned a very interesting fact about myself. Yankee girls really dug me. I can’t really tell you why…
Maybe it was the way I said things like “Y’all and Reckon”.
 Maybe it was the way I opened the doors for them.
Maybe it was because I didn’t call a Coke,  a Pop...
Whatever the reason, I always seemed to capture the attention of a girl from up north every summer.
After playing “Brown Eyed Girl” for the tenth time in the evening, Tater told me that a girl with curly brown hair had been eying me all night. I hadn’t thought much about hooking up with any girls at that time... I was still pretty down about Katie. However, he persisted and eventually I gave in and went to talk to her. Our conversation lead to a walk on the beach, which led to sitting by the dunes under the moonlight, which led to other things… I think I made it to 3 1/2 bases that night.
After joining the crowd later on, Tater asked me about it. I told him the somewhat graphic details (keeping some things to myself). He asked if within the past six or so hours if Katie had crossed my mind..
“No” I replied.
He smiled and then asked me the curly headed girl’s name.
………..
I stood there in silence and in shock, not believing that I didn’t know the girls name. He hit the ground laughing. Tater to this day still refers to her as “Whatshername”
Her name was Erin (I think).
A few months later, we were back at the campground. It was during that trip that I learned how summertime, and the Steve Miller Band can go hand in hand. It was also during that weekend that I answered a dare. Tater dared me to put Sun In in my hair after I joked about trying to change my persona for senior year. I bought it, I put it in my hair, and it turned bright red. I looked like a short, skinny, Ronald McDonald. My Mother was thrilled. My senior yearbook picture features me in a fake tux, with fake hair and a real red sunburn. I prefer to think of it being ahead of my time. I had highlights ten years before they were fashionable.
1991/1992 was a good year to be a Fighting Scot of Scotland High School.
It was announced during our junior year that “The Pride Of Scotland County” The SHS Marching Band would be flying to NY to be in the Macy’s Day Parade. I was excited and proud of my high school that year. I had a few friends that were in the Marching Band, and knew of one girl that would light up the TV brighter than the Tree in Rockefeller Center.
That would be Megan Alba Biel.
Even before school started, I began to rehash my dreams of asking her out. As badly as my heart was broken over the break up with Katie, thoughts of strawberry kisses from MAB still floated through my dreams like a feather lost in the wind. Sometimes fantasy can help you get over reality…
School started with a bang. We were seniors! I had a couple of classes with Jason, and things started off a little rocky between us (mostly because of me), but after a while... things settled down. I got caught up in the excitement of my last year in HS. A lot had changed since I first entered the doors of Scotland High School, and even more changes were coming. 

7. Yearbooks/Birthday/The Fallout

End of Junior Year/Yearbooks/Beginning of Summer

We got our yearbooks in late may, a couple of weeks before the end of school.
They were rather bland looking with a white cover and blue “people” on them and lettering in red.  Not exactly the most dynamic choice of design.   Inside there were tons of photos documenting the year.  I was just a junior, so my picture was black and white, though a bit larger than the thumbnail picture from the year before. I was significantly skinnier in my junior picture, though it still looked awful.  My hair looked messy and the light blue shirt I chose to wear that day didn’t highlight my pale complexion in a black and white picture.
 I had a lot of my classmates and friends to sign the book (Except one... More about that in a few).
Most folks wrote the standard cliché lines…
 “Great getting to know you in History Class”
 “Have a great summer”
And of course the old stand-by from most girls –
”You’re such a sweet guy… yada yada.”
While the notes were appreciated, there were only three people I felt like I HAD to get signatures from. I reserved three spots in my yearbook for the three special people in my life.
A spot for my best friend since Sixth Grade – David ‘Tater’ Turner – A Great American.   Though his love of boats and bass had taken priority, I couldn’t be mad at him for that.  Honestly he had taken a backseat to my new girlfriend, Katie.
One  for Jason  - Jason and I had become pretty close over out Junior year. I guess it would be fair to say that he stood in for Tater in his absence for a while.  We shared a lot of common interest, one in particular that would put a strain on our friendship eventually.
Lastly, one for Katie Coleman – The girlfriend, whom which my entire world revolved around.
Katie and I spent nearly every weekend night together during the last few weeks of school. She was excited about her upcoming graduation, and I was excited my senior year was right around the corner.


My Birthday/ The Fallout


I turned Seventeen years old on June 10th
On June 12th I got the phone call to meet Katie at her house… “We needed to talk”.I didn’t have a lot of experience with relationships, but I knew what those words meant.
I drove to her house with butterflies in my stomach, but not the good kind.  My mind was racing with thoughts of what I was going to say when she told me the news I didn’t want to hear.
I could play it cool, and say something like - “Yeah, I’ve been thinking we should end it too.  It’s been fun.  Keep in touch”, and then give her a hug as I walk out the door.
I could lose my temper. – “So this is how it ends huh?  Go figure!  You know what, you don’t deserve a guy like me anyway.  You want to date Jason now! Is that it?  Go ahead!  I don’t give a damn!”
She explained to me that she was going away to college and she didn’t want a long distance relationship. My mind quickly ran through all of the times I had thought she was flirting with Jason, so I immediately second guessed her.
This break up had nothing to do with moving away, she had her eyes on somebody else…

Someone who I admittedly I was very jealous of.
Jason had everything I didn’t.
He was more athletic than me.
He was a more popular than I was.
He always got the leading role in any play we were in.
I hear he even once kissed Kim Stone -Everybody’s Dream Girl and Cheerleader Extraordinaire.
And now, it appeared he had captured the attention of my girl.

I didn’t know what to say. I just told her I understood. I didn’t confront her about my suspicions (though I had brought it up numerous times in the past), I just let her talk…
I then begged her to reconsider before I left, but in her eyes it was over and done, and so it was.

I left hurt, angry, and felt betrayed.

I got in my car and drove home, trying to fight back the tears. But alas, they came… and they seemed to never stop. I pulled my car over on the side of the road and cried like I hadn’t done since I was a child.
I pounded the dash, hit the steering wheel, turned the radio up as loud as I could and I screamed. I was angry at the situation, angry at her, angry at Jason, and mostly angry at myself for allowing myself to get this upset.

I remember thinking to myself “This isn’t how most guys would handle something like this. I bet none of the cool popular guys get this upset over a break up… what’s wrong with me? How come I can’t be more like them”

That’s when it hit me.

I wasn’t upset just because of the break up. I was upset because I had finally met a girl that looked at me as more than just “A nice guy”. I was more than just a guy who was “Sweet, and so friendly”.. She made me feel like something more than just another “good guy”, she made me feel like a Man, like a somebody. I had that with her… and now it was gone.

In the end I looked for somebody to blame. Unfortunately, I chose the most innocent party in the whole situation. I took my anger out on Jason. I said and did things in the aftermath of mine and Katie’s breakup that I am to this day I am not proud of. I couldn’t be angry at her because I was still in love with her, and I was too naive to see the third person who was responsible was me.

My own insecurities, paranoia, and jealousy over her and Jason had really put a strain on the relationship. I am not sure if there ever really was anything between them, other than innocent flirtation. But my imagination, and own self doubt escalated whatever might have been there into something much larger than it really was.
The term ‘Loss of Innocence’ gets thrown around a lot.

 Most use it as a sexual reference. I disagree. I believe one loses his/her innocence when he/she has their first REAL heartbreak. I have been in love since my first love, but never so openly or trustingly. I fell head first with no thought of how it could end. There were times in my adult life when I wished I could find that trust again…

There is still a blank page in my Junior Yearbook with the heading that says – “Reserved for Katie Coleman”

My whole world revolved around Katie and when she left… she took my world with her.
As it always does, it felt like forever, but time heals all wounds.

It would take multiple trips to the beach (along with the a not-so innocent hook up with a Yankee girl from PA), the solid rock of friendship from my best friend David ‘Tater’ Turner – A Great American, the introduction to something that would become a MAJOR passion for me, AND an impromptu lunch date with Megan Alba Biel to help me move on, and to appreciate what was going to be the best year of my HS career.

6. Junior Year/ I've Been Loving You Too Long

Junior Year
1991

For the first time in my teenage life, I felt like I had a real girlfriend.
We spent HOURS on the phone talking about absolutely nothing whatsoever.
Katie - “I think my favorite M&M is the red one”
Me - “I’m more of a green guy myself, but reds are good too”
We drove around in my Mustang with the windows down, one hand on the wheel, the other one in hers, all the time singing at the top of lungs to the radio. I can’t say either of us was on key, but does it really matter when you are singing a bad Poison song?
She and I were one of those typical teenage couples who would argue over who would hang up first after a five hour conversation.

Me - “I’ve got to hit the hay, it’s going be a long day tomorrow”
Katie – “Yeah, it’s getting late”
….. Silence…..
Me – “I don’t want to hang up.”
Katie – “Me either.   You hang up.”
Me – “No, You hang up”
Katie – “No seriously, you hang up”

Whenever the opportunity arose (which was often), I found myself using the term “My Girlfriend” to anybody who would listen.

“You know, when I was talking to my Girlfriend last night….”
“I found out the most interesting thing about My Girlfriend yesterday.”
“This song SO reminds me of My Girlfriend, Katie.”

Katie and spent a lot of time talking about our past as kids growing up together. When you considered the fact that her parents and my parents had been long time friends, dating to way back before we were born.  It was almost as if it were meant to be that we were together.
The term “written in the stars” was used far too often between the two of us.
We discussed dreams in a way that we both knew they were going to come true. She seemed to believe in me, more than I believed in myself. I in turn believed in her and made sure she knew it. If I could have found the confidence in myself that she seemed to have in me, I think the dynamic of our relationship might have been different.  Because Katie was my first real girlfriend, my biggest fear in our relationship was her finding out that I wasn't worthy of a girlfriend like her.

In my mind, I was still the same 12 year old kid who was constantly tormented and made of in Middle School.  After years of hearing you're not worth anything, you start to believe it.  Once you start to believe such things, they are hard to shake. 

Even though we had only been dating a few months, I had grown so close to her that the thought of losing her was terrifying. I was hopeless and spineless at the same time.

I was so into Katie; that I even let her convince me to take down the poster in my bedroom of the Hot Girl in the Pink Bikini with really big…

HAIR.

This poster was a big deal for me, as the girl with really big… hair, was the hottest girl I had ever seen. For some reason, I decided I should share that with Katie.
Not a good idea.
Some might even make the argument that girl in the poster kind of resembled my High School dream girl- Megan Alba Biel.  That might have been a strong reason why I bought it in the first place.

I wasn’t the only fan of the girl in the poster with really big….HAIR.

My buddy Jason had bought one as well. Jason hid his poster inside of his closet door. That is until his mother found it and made him take it down. 

Apparently she wasn’t a big fan of girls in bikinis with really big…HAIR.

Outside of David ‘Tater’ Turner – A Great American, Jason was one of my best friends in High School.

About the time I started dating Katie, ‘Tater’ bought himself a new fishing boat. He spent a fair amount of time at his Uncle Martin’s pond chasing bass.  He was a bit too busy for anything else, so we didn’t hang out quite as often for a little while.

It’s hard to compete with a new boat and fresh bass.

Partly because of Tater’s angling obsession, and the fact that I had become way more involved in the Theater department at school, Jason and I hung out quite a bit during my Junior year. We were in the same drama productions together, which meant hours after school in rehearsals. On top of that, we lived in the same neighborhood so he as we became closer friends, we hung out more and more at each other’s houses.
There was always a hint of competitiveness (and if I’m honest, jealousy on my part) in our friendship. We both had pretty much the same interest, the only problem was, Jason was always a little better than me in most of them.  If you add to that equation that he was a bit taller and better looking than me, you can see where the jealousy came from. 

The first time Jason met Katie, he was quite impressed.  I was happy that she seemed to enjoy talking to him as well.  It was great that my buddy enjoyed hanging out with me and “My Girlfriend” so much. 
That night after Katie left my parents house, Jason hung out for a little while longer. He told me that I was out kicking my coverage with her.  I agreed wholeheartedly, and told him how lucky I felt to had re-connected with her.
 Then he said something that I wished I hadn’t heard him say -

“You know dude, if it doesn’t work out with you two, I wouldn’t mind going out with her”.

Near the end of Junior Year
1991




Katie and Jason were both pretty outgoing and they clicked pretty quickly. They laughed and joked around together quite a a bit.  Sometimes when she laughed at something Jason would say, Katie would touch his arm or shoulder.

That didn't get unnoticed by me.

Jason became a topic of conversation with Katie more and more often after a while.  Often times, when one was getting ready to leave, a friendly hug between the two seemed to go on too long(in my opinion).  I began to notice eye contact between them in way that wasn't in a way that friends look at each other.

The words - “You know dude, if it doesn’t work out with you two, I wouldn’t mind going out with her”, rang in the back of my head far too often. 



Katie had a friend named Jennifer, who she said she wanted to hook up with Jason.  Jen was a nice girl, with shoulder length light brown hair and pretty light brown eyes.  She was full of personality, and seemed to laugh at everything.  I thought she would be a good match for Jason as well, (honestly anybody to get his attention off of Katie was welcomed by me). 

Katie came by the house with Jen for Jason to meet her.  We all went riding around in my 1986 Blue Ford Mustang listening to the radio, finding things to laugh at, and trying to get into mild mannered  trouble.  It was a typical Saturday night for teens in rural NC.  

Once the girls left, Jason hung out with me for a bit at my place.
“What did you think of Jen?” I asked.
“She seems pretty cool.  She’s a nice girl” He replied.  “I know what you guys are doing,. I’m not looking for a girlfriend or anything like that.  Besides, she’s not really my type.”
“Hey, that was Katie’s idea, not mine” I told him.
“Really?” he seemed surprised.  “Do you think she thinks I’m a third wheel or anything?  I mean, I like hanging out with you guys, but I don’t want to get in the way.”
“No, I don’t think she thinks that at all.  I really think Katie likes having you around.  Maybe she just thinks you would be a good fit with Jen.  If you don’t like her, then it’s no big deal. I’ll just tell her”.
“Well she’s cool to hang out with and seems like a lot of fun, I just don’t want any expectations for more than us just being friends”. He said.

And with that, our trio became four deep.






I’ve Been Loving You Too Long

Jennifer’s  parents were out of town, and she invited us over to hang out.
It was a large white house with an ‘Old South’ look to it.  A huge wrap around porch, the interior had hard wood floors, expensive rugs and tons of antiques.  Homes like that are quite common in small southern towns. I drove by houses like that quite often, but never had been inside of one.
Katie wasn’t acting like herself that day.  She and I were hanging out alone in the enormous living room surrounded by expensive antiques and artwork.   I was scared to touch anything in the house, including Katie.
Being a man (albeit still quite young and naïve), I did the natural thing.  I asked the question – “What’s wrong”.
Her being a woman (albeit still young, and not quite as naïve) replied “Nothing”, quietly.
“Something’s wrong, tell me”.  I said in return.
“Nothing” she replied.

You know how this game is played, I’m sure.

The back and forth continued until eventually she said something that was unexpected.
“I’m not happy.  With anything.” She looked at me for my reaction.
I felt all the blood in my body rush to my head, my heart beat pounded.  She was breaking up with me.
“Not happy with us, you mean?” pausing before asking the question I didn’t want the answer to.
“Not just us.  I’m not happy with anything”.
“I don’t get it.  What did I do wrong?”  I was feeling tears welling up, but trying hard not to show it.
She sighed heavily in frustration.  “You didn’t do anything wrong.  Jeez, nevermind!” she snapped.
Now I was getting angry.
“Fine.”  I said as I left the room.

I had caught a ride with Jason to Jens house.  I was in a awkward spot, because the last person I wanted to see, talk to, or be in a car with was Jason. Deep down, I knew the reason she wanted to break up with me was so she could pursue Jason.  I was incensed with anger and jealousy.
 But I also wanted badly to go home. 
I walked onto the front porch where I was met by Jason and Jen.   Jen could tell something was up, so she went into the living room to hang out with Katie.

“Dude, what’s up?” he asked me, as he could tell I was upset.
“I think Katie is trying to break up with me.” I said.  “Can you take me home?”
He looked surprised.  “Well can we hang out for just a little bit longer?” he asked me.
“What?  No. I want to go home. Take me home. ” I said raising my voice.
"What happened? What did you guys talk about?" he asked.
“I don’t want to get into details right now.  Hell, I’m not even sure what the details are. I just want to go home”
Jason sighed in frustration.  “Alright, whatever… Let me go inside and say goodbye to Katie and Jen.”
That’s when I said out loud what I had been thinking all along.
“While you’re in there, be sure she gives you that long hug she always gives you.  Once she’s single I’m sure there may be even more to come”.  I said.
“What is that supposed to mean?”  Jason said turning around to face me.
I said nothing in return.
“What are you trying to say?” he asked getting in my face.
“You know DAMN well I what I mean!” I said in return, not backing down.
Jason suddenly tried to calm down the situation by saying “Look man, you and Katie are upset but there is no need to accuse me of anything.  Katie and I are just friends”
“For now, what about after she breaks up with me?” I asked.
He put his hand on my shoulder.  “Dude” he said sympathetically.
I pushed his hand off of my shoulder.
“What the Hell?!” he said.
 “You want her, she’s in there.. Go get her” I said, pushing him.

I got what I wanted in return.  He pushed back.

At that point in my life, I had never thrown a single punch. I had always been afraid of fighting. I was bullied so much in my adolesence that I just accepted that I would never win one, so why try?
At that moment however, my right hand was clinched and I was ready to throw down for my first time.  I wanted to hurt him so badly.  Truthfully, my anger was misdirected. I loved Katie too much to put any blame on her, so fighting Jason just made sense.

I pushed Jason again, harder this time. I wanted him to throw the first punch.  I wanted him to be the bad guy. I was ready to throw mine in return.
That’s when Jen came back on the porch, seemingly shocked to witness our behavior.

“What the Hell?” she said to both of us.
It was at that point that I realized that getting into a fight might not be in my best interest if I wanted to hold on to even the slightest thread of hope of  staying with Katie.
“I just want to go home” I repeated out loud.
“I’ll give you a ride” Jen offered.
I realized if she gave me a ride home, that would leave Jason and Katie at the house all by themselves.  I wasn’t that gullible, I thought.
“No, you stay here with Katie.  Jason can give me a ride home. Right, Jason?”
I knew he didn’t want to.  I also didn’t want to be stuck in a car with him.  However, I also knew that if he said no, it would make him out to be the bad guy.  It was manipulative, but smart idea on my part.

“Sure.” said Jason.
“I don’t think that’s a good idea” Jen said.
“No, we’re fine now.  Just got a little heated, that’s all.  It’s fine, I promise”, I assured her.
“Yeah, everything’s okay.” Jason said.
So we drove back to my house.  It was a twenty minute drive.  Neither of us said a word.  He pulled into the driveway.  I opened the door, and walked into the house.
I went directly to my room and turned my stereo on.   My ‘Otis Redding’s Greatest Hits’ was in the cassette player.  I was heartbroken and scared for what might be coming next between Katie and myself.  ‘ These Arms of Mine’ was the song that was playing that stormy night behind the hospital a few weeks before.  I didn’t want to hear that song.  I chose another.

You are tired and you want to be free
My love is growing stronger
As you become a habit to me
Ooh I’ve been loving you, too long
I don’t wanna stop now

The phone rang.

“I’m sorry”, Katie said.
“I’m sorry too”, I replied (though I wasn’t sure what I was sorry for).

We went on with the mindless chatter that teens have, like nothing had happened earlier that day.  Though the seed of jealousy and doubt that had been planted began to grow, I didn’t let on.
After talking to Katie for an hour or so, another call beeped in.

It was Jason.   He apologized for letting things get heated between the two of us. 
“I just want you to know that Katie and I are just friends, and that’s it.  I don’t have any interest in being anything else with her.” he told me.
I apologized to him as well, and then assured him that I believed him.

I lied.

It seemed suspicious that he called not long after she did. I wondered if they had called each other before they called me.  I wondered how their conversation went.  Was I being paranoid?  It was all far too confusing. The one thing I did know was that I didn’t want to lose Katie.
What I didn’t understand at the time was why I felt that way, and that ultimately, it would be for the best.

Many theories, thoughts and fears ran through my heads as Otis’ Sitting on the Dock of the Bay’ sang me to sleep that night. 

5. Prom(s)/These Arms Of Mine

Prom(s)/These Arms Of Mine



My Junior Prom

It was a disaster.
For starters, my tuxedo arrived VERY late (as in about three hours before the prom).  The tux I ordered had to come from a warehouse in Greensboro, NC (which is about 2 ½ hours away from my hometown of Laurinburg, NC).  It was scheduled to arrive the day before my Prom.  However, somehow the order got screwed up, and a tuxedo three times too big was sent instead.  We instantly sent the tux back, and I was assured the correct size would be sent promptly.
It wasn’t.

Three hours before the Prom was supposed to start, I was still hanging around Belk Department Store (the company I worked for at the time), waiting to get my tux.  I finally called Katie.
“I don’t think I’m going to get it in time” I told her disappointed.
She assured me that it would be okay, and that we could still look forward to going to her Prom the following weekend at her School. I hung up the phone disappointed, but accepting the fact that it wasn't meant to be.

As I was walking out to my car, one of the guys I worked with shouted out to me, “We’ve got it!  It just came in!” I ran back into the store, tried it on and it fit perfectly, (except the cummerbund, which looked like it went all the way up to my chest.)*

* Fashion Tip – Short skinny dudes should always forgo the cummerbund with a tuxedo and go with a vest.

 I called Katie back, “It’s here, it looks like we can go after all!”

“Wait a minute, so we’re going now?"  Katie asked. 

I explained to her that they caught me as I was walking out to my car, and told me about the tux’s arrival, and how this one fit perfectly, (I didn’t mention the cummerbund).

“Okay, come on over, and I’ll start getting ready.  We’re going to be pretty late getting there, but at least we get to go.” she said sounding a bit frustrated.
I didn’t understand why she was upset with me. It wasn't my fault that the original tuxedo didn't fit and had to be sent back. It also wasn't my fault that it took so long to arrive.  Regardless, I was sure that once we finally got to  Prom, all would be forgotten.

I went over to Katie’s house in my tux, and waited while her Mom helped her get ready.

I waited for two hours.

I sat on the couch in the living room with her younger brother Bobby, while Katie and her Mom occupied her bedroom with the door closed.  They were having intense Mother Daughter moments as they prepared Katie for our big night.  Their voices got louder and more frustrated as time went on.
Bobby was an underclassman at Katie’s High School, and wasn’t a very talkative kind of guy.  He was wearing jeans with a chain wallet, a Metallica T-shirt and his hat that said ‘Slacker’ was on backwards.
The conversation between Bobby and myself was fairly one-sided.

“So… What’s new with you Bobby?”  I asked.
“Nothing”, he replied obviously not wanting to talk to me.
The Braves game was TV.
“It looks like Atlanta is finally turning things around” I said, trying to expound on our common interest in the game.
“Baseball is stupid.” He said.
“Then why do you have the game on?” I asked.
He didn’t answer.
“Are you looking forward to Spring Break this year?” I asked him, changing the subject, and desperately trying to start a conversation to help make the time go by faster.
“Yeah, I guess”, he said staring at the game he had just said he had no interest in watching.   He wasn’t giving an inch.
“I’ve been her for almost two hours. How long does it take to put on some make-up and a dress?”  I asked him jokingly, with a well intended nudge like men do when they are talking about women.

“I heard that!” Katie shouted from the next room, obviously not amused by my attempt at camaraderie with her little brother.  “It isn’t my fault that we are late leaving.  You’re the one who showed up two hour late because of the tuxedo problems from your work.  I thought we weren’t going, but now we are.  A girl can’t get ready for Prom in 10 minutes!” 

"You two deserve each other.” Bobby mumbled, rolling his eyes as he got up and left the living room.

The remainder of the time, I sat on the couch and didn’t say another word. 
I watched the Braves blow an 8-1 lead and lose the game. It was a good sign of how the day was going so far. 

Finally she walked out of her bedroom, and I saw her for the first time in her prom dress.
She was wearing a black strapless dress and her short dark hair was fixed differently that how it normally looked.  She looked beautiful, but she didn’t look like the Katie I was used to seeing.
I smiled at her as she walked into the living room. That would have been a good time to say how pretty I thought she looked, or compliment her on her dress, or say how I much I loved her hair that way.  

I didn't.

 After waiting in the living room for two hours, while listening to Katie and her Mom bicker and argue behind the closed door of her bedroom, the first thing I could come up with to say was – “Alrighty, are you ready?”

She didn’t respond. Obviously, it was not the best thing to say at the moment. She already wasn’t happy, and saying that didn’t help matters.  Katie’s dress was a bit too puffy for her liking.  No girl wants to go to prom in a dress that makes her look like Scarlett O’Hara, even if we were in the South.

So after sticking around to let her Mom take a few pictures, we finally left the house.

Because we were running so late, our dinner reservations to the fancy restaurant I had intended on going to were lost.  We had to settle for an alternate plan for dinner.  We settled on the local Holiday Inn’s buffet restaurant.  It was nearly nine o’clock by the time we left Katie’s house, so our options were limited.
The food was horrible and made us both a little sick.  Excusing yourself to go to the bathroom multiple times kind of kills any romantic intentions of Prom Night.

When we finally did make it to the prom, most of my friends had already gone home. Katie wasn’t feeling well from the horrible food we had just eaten, so she made it clear not long after arrival that she wasn’t up to dancing. 

Looking back, I think she was more upset of how the entire evening had gone down. 

Because it took so long to get my tuxedo, we were uncertain if we were going to the Prom at all. 
Once I finally did get it, and told her we could go, she had felt rushed to get ready.
When she finally was ready, the dress didn’t fit the way she wanted.
Dinner plans certainly didn’t go as planned, as evidenced by our churning stomachs and my far too many frequent trips to the restroom. 

So no, she wasn’t in the mood to dance. 

Everything that could go wrong in one evening went wrong that night. We left not long after our arrival to the dance. We were both disappointed and angry. We were angry at the circumstances, the night itself, and a little at each other, though nobody really was to blame. Regardless, next day, I felt guilty for everything going wrong.

I sent her roses to her work. On the card I had written – Last night didn't work out the way expected.  I’m sorry. I promise to make it up to you. 

 Her Senior Prom
One week after the horrible night at my prom, Katie’s Senior Prom night came.  
It was a far better experience. I wore the same tux (minus the cummerbund),  so there were no worries about the arrival. Katie borrowed a dress from her cousin. It was one that she was much happier with,( it was a light blue lacey dress that was far less ‘Gone With the Wind’ looking).  We went to restaurant we had originally intended to go to the week before, and the food was delicious.

Every slow song that came on, I sang in her ear. She said loved to hear me sing. I knew absolutely NOBODY there, so my inhibitions were gone.  We danced like fools and laughed at how crazy we thought we looked dancing.

“This is so much more fun than last weekend” she told me.  I felt relief in the fact that I was giving her the Prom Night that we both wanted. The last song they played that night was ‘Never Say Goodbye’ by Bon Jovi.   The lyrics seemed somewhat fitting after the night we had shared the weekend before.

Remember at the prom that night
You and me we had a fight
But the band they played our favorite song
And I held you in my arms so strong

I held her tight enough to feel her heart beat against my chest. I imagination ran wild as I felt her every curve and breath.  It was a perfect night.

These Arms of Mine

The following Friday night, like I often did, I went to meet Katie after she got off work from Quincy's Steakhouse.  It was raining cats and dogs that night, with a gloriously loud and well lit spring time thunderstorm.  Our other friday tradition was pulling into our spot behind Scotland Memorial Hospital.
The mixture of her honeysuckle perfume, and the smell of rain on the hot pavement made a perfect late spring/early summer scent. Our kisses were long and deep in the backseat of my Blue Ford Mustang.

We played ‘These Arms Of Mine’ by the great Otis Redding on repeat in the cassette player.  It was first released in 1964 on Stax records, however the melody and lyrics meant just as much to teenagers in the backseat of a car in 1991 as it did in 64.

These arms of mine, they are burning
Burning from wanting you,
These arms of mine
They are wanting, wanting to hold you

My breath was heavy and my heart beat fast with anticipation of what I thought might come of this stormy night. It didn’t take me long to know that Katie had been waiting for a night like this.  

Timing and romance mean everything to a teenage girl.

I had been waiting too.

She asked me “Have you ever been this far before” as she unbuttoned my shirt.

“Yeah, a few times” I said, with my hands slightly shaking in anticipation of what they were revealing. 

I lied.  

With the lightning flashing all around us, and the sound of rain on the windshield mixed with thunder and Otis Redding singing/begging in the background, I learned for the first time what it felt like to feel both the ultimate state of vulnerability and to feel like a man, at the same time.

 “I love you, Katie”, I said.

That wasn't a lie.

“I love you too”, she whispered. 

In the spring of 1991, my entire world revolved around Katie Coleman. In the summer that followed, I would watch my world slip away.  What I wouldn't know was that was best thing that could have happened to me.  The events that came afterward would set the stage for life changing experiences, though I wouldn't recognize them at the time.

However, that night the future seemed so far away, as it should have. 

4. Summer/Junior Year

A New Car and Summer by the Gazebo

Blue.
It’s my favorite color, and always has been.
Blue.
It was my favorite crayon as a kid.
Blue.
It was the color of the majority of shirts in my closet.
Blue.
It’s the color of the majority of jeans I wore (though some were acid washed, (it was 1990-91 btw).
It is the color of the beloved UNC Tar Heels.
and finally…

Blue.
It was the color of my first car.
My Blue 1986 Ford Mustang.

I found it at a used car lot not to far from my High School.  It cost $6,000.  I had some money for a down payment, but not enough for the whole note.  I talked my Dad into letting me finance it. 

The car payments were $156 a month.  I couldn’t believe how expensive a car could be.

I had to get a job. I found one at Belk Department Store (A Southern Staple for Quality Fashion). It was the only store in my hometown that carried name brand clothes. I chose to work there for that reason.  I wanted to dress nice, and with an employee discount, I was able to do so. I also needed money for a car insurance and gas, plus I could buy nice clothes relatively cheaper, so it worked out well. My days of hand me downs were behind me, as were my red Huffy days.

My best friend David ‘Tater’ Turner, - A Great American and  I spent the majority of the summer driving around, listening to the radio, circling the Stop and Go on Main Street, checking out the girls parked with their friends in various parking lots (though we never really stopped to talk to them…).

As most summers were for me back then, it was a great summer.

My family and I went to Pirateland Family Campground in Myrtle Beach, SC over the summer for the week of 4th of July.  For the first time, Tater came a long with us. Also for the first time, I carried my guitar with me on vacation.

On a whim, Tater tried to convince me that I should carry it down to the gazebo by the ocean.

“I bet there will be girls there”, he suggested.

“I don’t know Man, I don’t want run anybody off or make anybody mad.” I said, shooting down his idea.

“Well, let’s just go down there for a little while and see what happens. If it doesn’t seem like a good idea, you can keep in its case” he said.

Tater was (and still is), a very wise man.

We went down to the gazebo, and I had my guitar case in hand. A guy with an incredible mullet(it was the early 90’s) by the name of Jonathan was there with a cute skinny blonde girl with braces and obnoxiously large hair.  We chatted it up for a bit, and then Jonathan asked me, “Are you going play that thing, or are you just carrying it around?”

I took it out of its case and began to play for a bit. Not long after, other folks began to show up as well. Pretty soon they were making request.

“Hey do you know an Aerosmith?”  the skinny blonde girl with awful hair asked.

“Sure, which one?” I replied while hitting an A chord.

“How about some Jimmy Buffet? Jonathan requested.

“I love JB!  How about this one?” casually strumming the famous opening Margaritaville.

Gradually, more and more people began to show up. 

Not long after, an entire crowd were screaming “SALT!!!”  during the chorus of the Buffett classic.

Feeling like a Rock Star can really improve time spent on vacation.  I strongly recommend it.  

It was crazy how shy I was in a one on one basis, but put me in front of a crowd to perform and I became a different person.

 In one night, what started out as a few friends just goofing off, wound up being about twenty or more kids hanging out and singing along. We did it every night for the entire week.  The longer the night became, the louder we sang.  I’m sure it sounded awful to others who passed by, but we didn't care.  I couldn't remember a time when I was any happier.

We quickly became friends with a multitude of kids who were from places scattered across the country. Many of which had grown up going to the same campground every summer for years, just like I had, however we were just meeting for the first time; all because Tater convinced me to bring my guitar to the gazebo one night. 

We became friends with the Moore sisters Spring and Heather from Ohio, Dan from Pennsylvania, the beautiful Lee sisters, Britney and Buffy from Ramseur NC,  and Crazy Ben and Eric from down in SC were always fun to have around.   Tater and I  became really good friends with Jonathan who was from nearby Rockingham NC (less than 15 miles away from our hometown).

Every year, we came together to celebrate summer together, singing, laughing and occasionally hooking up. It was a rite of passage for teenagers, and I was glad to be part of such a great group of people.

Also it seemed every summer after that, I would meet a random girl who was almost always from somewhere up north.  The summer before my Junior year, a cute blonde from New Jersey caught my attention. 

She was wearing a low cut pink tank top and short white shorts. 

She smiled at me, I smiled back.

I took a break from playing, and we took a walk down the beach together.

It wasn’t long after that we were breaking in the back seat of my Blue Mustang.*

* Little known fact - Mustang backseats are difficult to make out in.

As it does every year, summer came to an end far too quickly.  Jersey Girl went back up north, and my junior year at Scotland High School approached. It was long before email and social media, so we did what all summer flings do, we promised to write each other.

 

We never did.

Junior Year/ Prom Plans

1990

Who knows by then, maybe you will have found another girl to be crazy about.”- Kim Stone, (Every guys dream girl and High School Cheerleader Extraordinaire)

Jimmy Coleman and My Dad were best friends coming up through HS.

Jimmy went off to Vietnam for a couple of trips,

Dad couldn’t pass the physical (thankfully).

Jimmy came home and started dating Kathy.

Not long after, Dad met Momma.

A couple years later Jimmy and Kathy got married.

Then, Dad and Momma got married.

Jimmy and Kathy welcomed there daughter Katie into the world in the spring of 73.

I came along in the summer of 74.

Our families stayed close off and on throughout mine and Katie’s childhood.

We would visit each other from time to time. Katie and I would play and keep each other occupied while our parents visited.

As time went on, and careers and life took off… the visits became fewer and farther between, but our families stayed in touch.

A few months before my Junior Prom, my Mother and Kathy were talking on the phone. They were talking about how time had flown and how they couldn’t believe that Katie and I were both in High School. Katie lived about 15 miles outside of my hometown, but went to a different school than I.

I really don’t know how the conversation went, but somehow they began talking about the Prom. Kathy told Mom that Katie had just broken up with her boyfriend, and Mom told Kathy that I was a pathetic loser who couldn’t find a date if it killed me (just kidding, she really didn’t say I was a pathetic loser… She might have mentioned the lack of dating part though).

So after discussing our predicament, her Senior Prom and my Junior Prom coming up in a couple of months, they agreed that it would be a great idea if we went together.

“Do you plan on going to Prom this year?” my Mom asked me later that afternoon.

“I don’t know.” I replied, not wanting to admit out loud that there was no way I could convince Megan Alba Biel to go with me, and I really had no other prospects at the time.

I had no idea that Mom and Kathy had discussed my Prom predicament earlier that day.

“Well, I was talking to Kathy Coleman earlier today.  She told me that Katie didn’t have a date to her Prom either” she went on.

“So?”  I said, trying to pretend I didn’t know where the conversation was going.

“How about if you took her to your Prom and Katie took you to hers?” she asked with a smile.  The whole match making thing was making my Mother very happy apparently. I wasn't sold on the idea.

Had my social life come to the point to where I had to get my Mother to find me a Prom Date? I asked myself.

“I don’t know Ma, I can’t imagine she would be interested in getting set up by her Mom for her date to the Senior Prom”, not wanting to hurt her feelings by saying I kind of felt the same way.

The last time I saw Katie was about a year or so before in passing. Time had definitely been her friend, as she had grown up from being all knees and elbows as a kid, to become a very attractive young lady.

She had short brown hair and a tiny figure. She was barely over 5 foot. Her lips were full, her eyes were brown, and smile was contagious.

After thinking about it, I swallowed my pride.

“Okay Mom, if Katie’s cool with it, then I am too. But don’t push it.  I don’t want to come across as a desperate loser or anything. I said.   “It’s been a while since we have hung out, I guess it would be fun to catch up”.

I could tell she was happy with my decision, as she wasted no time calling Kathy back.

A couple of nights later, Katie called me and we talked it over on the phone.

“I think its sounds like a fun idea” she said.

“Sure” I replied.  “I hadn’t really thought much about Prom until Mom brought it up.  Now I’m looking forward to it;   though my ego is still bruised by my Mom having to arrange my Prom date”.

Katie laughed and said “I won’t tell if you won’t”.

She agreed to meet me at Belk (where I worked at the time) to help me pick out a tux that would match her Prom dress. She looked even prettier than I remembered.

She was planning on wearing a black dress with pink accents.  We picked out a tux with a pink bow tie and cummerbund.  I was on the fence about wearing pink at first, but Katie and my buddy and co-worker Tommy convinced me. “That would look fly” he said. I can honestly say, that was the first time the term “Fly” had been used when it came to anything in my wardrobe.

Katie and I talked over a few more details, and I walked her out to her car.

“This is going to be a lot of fun, I’m really looking forward to going with you.” she said.

“Yeah, who would have thought when we were five or so years old playing tag in my back yard, that we would grow up to go to be Prom Dates?” I replied.

“Call me later if you want to” she said.

“Okay” Oblivious to what she was trying to imply.

I watched her drive off in her red 65 Mustang, I went back into the store.  Tommy met me at the door, and caught me off guard with a high five.  Apparently, he had been spying on us in the parking lot.

“Damn, Son!” he said.  “She is all kinds of fine”.

He was right.  She was.

Tommy then went on to say many other inappropriate things I shouldn’t repeat about what I should plan on doing Prom night.  I would be lying if I didn’t admit I wasn’t considering them. 

The thought of dating someone other than a girl from my High School had never crossed my mind. Looking back, it’s really odd that I had never considered it.  Katie’s High School was less than 15 miles away from Scotland High, yet it seemed like another world away.

The dangerous thing about living your whole life in a small town, is after a while you tend to forget there are other people and places outside of the small circle you surround yourself in.

A few nights later Katie came by our house for us to talk about further plans for our big night(s).  We talked about friends who were each going to meet, where we could eat beforehand, etc. After sitting on the couch discussing this and that, she suggested that we go outside to get some fresh air.

We found ourselves in the swing in our backyard. Enjoying the crisp early spring air, the conversations we were having about Prom plans ended, and we began discussing memories from our childhood together.

“Do you remember that time we were playing hide and go seek in my backyard, and it took you forever to find me?” she asked.

It was a rather random question, but I did remember.

“Yeah, your back yard seemed so big and with so many trees.  That’s overwhelming for a seven year old”, I said kind of laughing.

“I thought you were never going find me, but you didn’t give up.  I don’t know why I remember that so vividly”, she said smiling.

That was when I noticed how close she was sitting to me on the swing.

I put my arm around her.  My heart was pounding.

“It’s a pretty night” I said staring into the sky.

“Yeah…” Katie whispered.

With her head on my shoulder, I turned her head to face me, and I kissed her for the first time.  The second and third kiss came soon after.

My Prom date was going to be more than just a ‘friends’ date. At that point, it didn’t matter how it was set up, it seemed perfect.  

Kim Stone- (Every guys dream girl and High School Cheerleader Extraordinaire), was right.  Megan Alba Biel couldn’t have been any further from my mind at that moment.  Katie Coleman became the first girl I could say I truly fell in love with, and it all started in the backyard in a swing.

3. Sophomore Year

Sophomore Year 

I’ve heard it said that jealousy can be the deepest shade of jade.

When I was fifteen, I was jealous over everything that seemed so unobtainable, but there was nothing I could do about it. It’s a hopeless feeling when you feel like TIME is your worst enemy.

I wanted to be sixteen so badly. I wanted freedom. I wanted my license. I wanted Megan Alba Biel.  Mostly though, at that time, all I REALLY wanted was a car!

It was so close, yet seemed so far away.  It’s amazing how much of your youth is wasted on not wanting to be young any longer. Slowing down isn’t an option for a teenage boy, even while they are sitting still.

A New White Isuzu Trooper.
That’s what HE drove.
Megan Alba Biel’s boyfriend was two years older than me.  He was better looking than me. He was WAY cooler than me. Also from where I was sitting, he had a far better life than I had at the time.
I rode a red Huffy and felt like I had nothing else.
When you’re a teenage boy, you are constantly looking for ways to prove your manhood.  That is why teenager boys are some of the dumbest people on the planet. They will go to great means to prove they are Men, even though most at that age don’t have a clue what it means. 
There are really only two reasons behind anything a young man does.

1.      To prove their worth.

2.      To impress a girl.

Being considered a man is something that means a lot at that age. All of that being said, it’s hard to feel like much of a man when your only means of transportation comes with pedals or sitting shotgun with a parent.
It was a happy day when I finally got learners permit. Granted I would have Dad riding shotgun beside me, but that was okay, because it was me that was behind the wheel. I was just one step away from my license, and some sense of independence.
Independence leads to coolness.
Coolness leads to girls.
Maybe even a girl like Megan Alba Biel.
I drove around with my Dad in his 1989 Black GMC Jimmy for those six months as much as possible. I made the trip around the block in our neighborhood about 5000 times during that period.
One time, Dad forgot he had a glass container of Vinegar in the back of the Jimmy.  That didn’t turn out so well.  Multiple carpet cleanings never did completely get the stench out of the vehicle.
Another time we were on the street where my Aunt Janice lived, and I hit a bump, turned the steering wheel to hard and took out her mailbox.  That is still discussed to this day at family gatherings.

Not only did my Aunt Janice live around the corner from us, but Megan Alba Biel’s boyfriend lived around the corner as well. With each trip around the neighborhood with Dad,  I would go down Azalea Dr and pass by his house.  If his car wasn’t in the driveway, I imagined what he and she might be doing in it.
I pictured them cruising up and down Main Street together (that’s all there was to do in my home town). He would have one hand on the steering wheel, with that ultra cool lean that all High School guys use while driving. The other hand would be holding hers. They would be listening to the radio with the window down in the Trooper. Her soft blonde hair blowing in the breeze, her perfect little red lips …
He had all of that, and I had my Father yelling at me “Stop completely!  Don’t tap the brakes! Slow down!!!”  In his defense, I’m pretty sure that Dad’s yelling was coming from more out of fear for our lives, than aggression. 

In addition to learning how to drive my Sophomore year, I also branched out in other areas too.



I got really active in our Theater department in School my Tenth Grade year. I had a lot of fun performing and learning about the arts. Regular classes always bored me, but anything creative energized me.  It helped there were TONS of pretty girls in my Drama class. I must admit, that was the main reason I signed up for the class the previous year.
Because there were so few guys in the class, I got a lot more attention from the ladies than I normally would have gotten in any other class. I felt more comfortable talking to girls in my tenth grade year. I can’t say I was really confident, but it did that the majority of them were older than me and WAY out of my league.
Though she was also out of my league, I can’t really say why I didn’t think the same way about Megan…

All of the older girls in class all thought I “was sweet”, and “such a nice guy”, and all the other things that a guy never wants to hear from girls, but I took it in stride.  At least they were talking to me. 


I became especially close to one girl in class.

A Junior named Kim Stone -Every guys dream girl and High School Cheerleader Extraordinaire was ideal example of the All American Girl Next Door.  She was all of 5 Feet tall, maybe 100 lbs soaking wet.  Her smile lit up a room, as did her laugh.  She spoke with a sugar sweet southern accent, and was as country as she was classy.  She was a bit preppy, but not snobbish. Kim truly was every guys dream girl in High School.  On game days, when she walked the halls of SHS, many hearts skipped as she walked by in her tiny red cheerleading out fit.  I’m sure she wasn’t oblivious to this, however she never seemed as if she was flaunting her charms either.
I would be lying if I said I didn’t have a crush on her.  However, over time we developed kind of a little brother/big sister vibe,(emphasis on “kind of” because on game days, she made my heart skip a beat or two as well).
Kim pointed out the obvious to me one day about my crush on Megan –

 “Her boyfriend is a senior. That means next year, he will be gone off to college and she may be single. That also means that you will be a junior, with a car, and who knows by then... maybe you will have found another girl to be crazy about.”



I didn’t realize it at the time, but she was correct in just about everything she said.
The following year, I did get my license.
MAB and the guy around the corner in the White Isuzu did break up.
I did find a girl to take my mind of Megan Alba Biel, even if it was just for a little while.

It all started when my Mom got me a date for the Prom….

2. Summer/Beginning of Sophomore Year

Summer/Beginning of Sophomore Year


The summer before my Sophomore year was a great one.
My family had a wonderful vacation over the 4^th of July at Pirateland Family Campground in Myrtle Beach S.C.
While we were enjoying quality time along the Grand Strand, I met a cute little brunette named Misty from Ohio. She had long brown hair, big brown eyes and was “more adventurous” than any other girl I had met before. For some strange reason, she took a liking to me.  After hanging out for a little less than a week, she let me go to 2nd base behind the poorly lit “Family Arcade”.
** A little known fact –   Touching boobies can do WONDERS for a young teenage boy’s confidence.

Also that summer, my best friend David ‘Tater’ Turner-A Great American, and I discovered a love for tennis. We spent nearly every night chasing a little yellow ball.
I wish I could say we became great tennis players, but I would be lying. I actually pretty much sucked. I was not then, nor ever have been very athletic. But we had fun. I lost a lot of the gut and butt that I was so self conscious about.  My Mom called it “baby fat”. I refused to acknowledge I lost “baby fat’ at 15 yrs old.

David ‘Tater’ Turner – A Great American had been my best friend since we were in 6th grade band together. We always were somewhat of an odd duo just to look at us.
When I was 15 I looked every bit of twelve years old.
When Tater was 15, he looked to be around 32.
Tater has been over six foot and 180 lbs since he was Nine years old (I may be stretching the truth with that one a little).
Tater was buying Skoal Smokeless Tobacco at 13.
Tater had a full on, Burt Reynolds- like mustache at 14.
I’m in my thirties now, and I still can’t rock a full on Burt Reynolds-like mustache…



Summer came and went way too quickly, and it was time to get ready for the up coming school year.  I always hated school shopping, especially when it came time to buy school clothes.  My Mom and Dad were always great when it came to providing for me, however I did wear my share of hand-me downs.
One of the draw backs of being a guy that is 15, (but is the size of a 12 year old) is that all of your classmates and friends are so much bigger than you. Especially when your best friend is a big ol’ boy like Tater. I was destined to get his hand-me downs from three years prior.
In other words, Tater’s Mom gave my Mom some clothes that he wore when we were in 8th grade together for me to wear my Sophmore year of High School.

It’s hard to feel cool about your style when that is the case.

I don’t want to sound ungrateful, but if you want to know the truth, all I wanted was to look like one of the “cool kids”; and my folks didn’t have the budget to really make that happen. 
I wanted to dress like the cool guys, because they dated the popular girls. I wanted to dress and look like the kind of guy that would catch the eye of a girl like the girl in 9th seat back of the 14th row in my Physical Science class.
During the summer before my sophomore year, I had a talk with my Dad. I explained to him what I was going through. I told him about the cute blonde in the 9th row 14 seats back. I told him about how I wanted to look like one of the “popular guys”.
He understood.
We went to Belk Department Store (A southern staple in world quality high-fashion), and bought clothes for my upcoming sophomore year. He didn’t say a word about the price of the clothes we were buying.


I guess now is the point of the story to where I need to come up with a name for the girl in the 9th seat back of the 14th row… I really don’t want to use her real name.  She did not ask to be written about, so I want to protect her identity, (plus I hope to avoid any legal complications if she were not to like what I write).
Let’s go with Megan.
Megan
Alba, (That can be a middle name, right?)
Megan Alba Biel.

 I went through my first day as a sophomore feeling much better about myself than I had my first day of school the year before.  The halls seemed far less crowded, and the school itself didn’t seem as large and intimidating in stature. I felt far more comfortable in my surroundings, and felt sympathetic for the new Freshmen who were feeling what I felt the same time a year ago.
I went through all of my classes hoping I would be in a class with Megan Alba Biel, but it wasn’t meant to be. We shared no classes my sophomore year.
The entire time we shared Physical Science class the previous school year, I imagined what a conversation with her would be like –
Me-“Hello Megan Alba Biel, you sure do look pretty today.”
MAB- “Thanks! Wow, I really like your smoking hot blue jean jacket. Is that a Guns and Roses patch on the back?”(It was the late eighties)
Me- “Why yes it is, would you like to wear it?”
MAB- “Totally!  Hey, do you want to make out?”

But sadly, that conversation never happened. 
The only time I did talk to her that year it went more like this-
Me- “Um, hey Megan Alba Biel. Can I borrow a pencil?”
MAB – “Sure.” (Not really making eye contact)
Me- “Thanks.” (Not really making eye contact either)

I wanted to see if I could muster up more than one sentence to say to her this year.
I had the clothes, I lost some weight, and I even changed my hair (I started feathering it back “preppy-boy style”).
However, I was missing one VERY important accessory.
One I had not thought of until school started.

About four days into the first week of school, I finally saw Megan in the parking lot. She was hanging out with a Senior who lived in my neighborhood. To be candid, (and this may be just sheer envy and jealousy talking), I thought he was a jerk.

He was obnoxious and loud.  He was a ball hog in basketball (his house was right behind the neighborhood basketball goal, around the corner from my house).  Overall, he was generally unlikeable if you asked me, (again… it could be a bit of jealousy talking).

However, he did have a few things I didn’t have.

For starters he was quite a bit taller than me and more athletically built than me, (All of those nights playing tennis with Tater hadn’t paid off for me that much). He was a baseball player with thick reddish hair, big arms, a thick neck, and an abnormally large, goofy looking head.   

He smoked Marlboro Reds with a type of cool that I would never have, (mostly because I didn’t smoke).

He also had the one accessory (that I mentioned earlier) that I did not have.

He had a C-A-R.

And, rumor was that he was Megan Alba Biel’s new boyfriend.